I won't grow up

I won’t grow up, don’t make me

I don’t want to say goodbye to people I love and get on a plane that takes me far, far away

I won’t grow up, don’t make me

I don’t want to have to make the brave choice or the right choice or whatever fucking choice it is that makes my heart hurt.

I won’t grow up, don’t make me

I don’t want to get up early or pound the pavement or go the extra mile to make it in a cruel and unforgiving world

I won’t grow up, don’t make me

I don’t want to pay bills and work part-time jobs that involve carrying trays or handing drinks to lifeless people in dresses that leave nothing to the imagination in places that blare music too loud

I won’t grow up, don’t make me

I don’t want to feel guilty or responsible or any feeling that does not come from having books read to me on a sunny couch in a house far away

But I will grow up, and no one will make me

because I made the decision to get on that plane and will make it time and time again

But I will grow up, and no one will make me

because I’m smart enough to know that what feels good right now won’t always feel good in the long run

But I will grow up, and no one will make me

because this is what I love to do and the only things worth pursuing are those things that challenge every fibre of your being

But I will grow up, and no one will make me

because I will not be a parasite and I will accept those jobs as a toll to be paid on the road to success or I will be innovative and find others

But I will grow up and no one will make me because

I am strong and smart and resilient and determined and I have already been given all the tools that I need to overcome the challenges in my life

I have grown up
But sometimes I will dress up as Peter Pan and pretend I never will